In his new book “My Life and Rugby” England coach Eddie Jones, explains how when you’re in a team, there are “four fatal fears”:
Fear of making a mistake
if you never make a mistake it means you’ve never challenged yourself to go beyond the limits. The moment you start something new, or step beyond the edge of risk, the chances of making a mistake are notably high. But every time you make a mistake you need to make a point of learning from it and not repeating it. When you become really brave, you don’t wait for somebody else to see the mistake. You put your hand up straight away.
Fear of losing
When you enter any contest in life you can only control yourself. But if you can deliver the performance that you’re capable of, every time, the result should take care of itself.
Fear of rejection
This means you don’t put yourself forward. But, by risking the fact you might be knocked back, you learn how to ask questions and to grow as a person.
Fear of criticism
But here the key point is to replace the word “criticism” with the concept of “feedback”. Once you start looking for feedback you will be much stronger and more resilient.