Many years ago BMP (before mobile phones) I made a date to meet a girlfriend in Italy on the 15th of July. We made the date in June since she was away for several weeks, as was I. We planned to meet at 12 noon at a particular table on the corner of the Piazza delle Erbe in Verona, where we had been in previous years visiting the Opera de Verona. I was driving from Lausanne down through Lake Garda and she was flying from London. At 12 sharp as I drove up to the square, my friend appeared around the corner. We ordered drinks and carried on planning the day.
I relate this very slight incident as an example of something that would never happen today. Apart from being older and assuming all manner of catastrophes lie in wait that I never imagined when young, the fact of mobile phones and the behaviour that goes with them means that meeting people or making arrangements has become a rather more provisional business. Making that same trip now, we would both be constantly on the phone seeking reassurance that neither of us had changed our mind and that we would indeed turn up at the agreed place on the day. With teenagers, (and disgracefully, too many adults) it’s impossible to nail down a commitment to anything longer than an hour away. What if there’s a better offer? The endless possibilities for changing, cancelling, postponing, re-arranging social encounters offered by the phone – never mind the distractions, the texts that must be answered and sent – means that life has become a series of ever more negotiable shorter term commitments fraught with anxiety.
I thought of this as I read Melanie Howard's fascinating piece in the March issue of Market Leader (Trendwatch). She calls it ‘Ish’ – as in shortish, longish, noonish – a sense of approximation rather than specificity but more importantly, provisional, not to say even optional, rather than certain.
Summed up in a sentence, ‘Ish’ means the reluctance to enter into anything that might entail a longer term commitment, be it marriage or a party a month away. Or, as Melanie describes, a long term phone or other kind of contract. She cites clients already tapping into this changed internal time scale where everything is negotiable and the possibility of a better offer (a livelier date or a new piece of technology) lies behind every decision.
If happiness is some kind of balance between choice and non-choice, when too little choice leads to frustration and too much to neurosis and paralysis, we are definitely tipping in the latter direction. But it’s hard to think of going back to what might think of as a simpler, more trusting, straightforward time for personal relationships: what can be done with technology eventually will be done. But the implications for products and services with contracts and time frames are considerable.
Read more from Judie Lannon in our Clubhouse.